Oooh. We got a live one 'captn.
donna_c_punk sent me this one. OMFG factor five.

Story Or Series Title: Clone. That's it. Woo for mysterious, alluring titles.[/sarcasm]
Fandom: Trigun.
Culprit Author's Name: Clone-Eden. Me senses a pattern here.

Full Name (plus titles if any): Clone. (I think the author likes clones...)
Full Species(es): Plant...Clone? Agh.
Hair Color (include adjectives): "platinum blonde hair, slightly spiked." As quoted.
Eye Color (include adjectives): Given it's a clone of Knives (whatthe?) blue eyes, Cold blue eyes. 'Least it's not "orbs".
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Green plugsuit count? O_O;
Special Possessions (if any): Apparently, Knive's Black gun, and quite a few screws loose apparently.

Annoying Origin: Knives, in a fit of insanity (I assume) cloned her as his replacement.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Bein' a sporking clone of Knives is enough. Oh and she calls Knives "daddy". Good golly molly.
Annoying Special Abilities: Increased strength, mental capacity of a three year old, can use Knive's gun, can kick the peace lovin' crap out of Vash...need I go on?
Other Annoying Traits: The author does a remarkable job of making Vash seem like a whiny git, and reducing Knives to a gibbering wreak of a sterotypical madman confronted with his clone. Oh and Knives can forget things. Because he does that all the time. I mean, he is the guy that held a century old grudge against his darling brother...?

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:


Disclaimer: Yeah, so what if I don't own Trigun? You don't have to rub it in..
Thank god you don't.

Two years after the fight between brotherly plants, Knives sits at a small table in his room, staring out the window at the black, star lit sky, desperately trying to ignore his brothers peace lectures. Ever since that fight two years ago, Knives couldn't get rid of his beloved brother and something had been bugging him. Like he forgot something before the fight, but try as he might, he just could not think of it. He shrugged it off like he had for two years. Even if he did forget something, it wouldn't matter after two years. ******

Just o_O; *Snips the boring, bad attempt at suspense*
Knives snapped out of his trance to glare at Vash. "No, you idiot! I made a clone of myself, just in case I would fail or was wounded beyond repair. But, as you can see, it was a failure." he said, gesturing to the woman Knives sitting on the sandy ground, smiling at him. Knives' eye twitched, failure indeed. "I don't know how you got out, but go back! I have no need for y-" he stopped as the woman produced the black gun and held to him as if offering it as an offering. Vash froze and Knives took the gun, awestruck. "How-"

"I found it when I woke up. I decided you might need it, so I brought it with me." she said as her welled up with tears. "I'm sorry-sniff- I used a bullet to kill a bunch of spiders that persisted of pestering me in my mission to bring it to you. sniff sniff. Please don't hurt me! I'll go buy another bullet for you right now." She shot up and ran to the nearest gun shop, leaving behind a dumbstruck Vash and Knives.

Vash snapped back and grabbed to the gun from Knives, running into his room before the elder sibling could process what happened. "VASH! GET BACK HERE WITH MY GUN!" Knives yelled, running up the stairs after his sibling. A muffled "no" came from the door as Knives reached it. "Vash, if you want to live another day, give me my gun. It's not my fault you destroyed yours." he said, getting another muffled "no" in response. Knives turned around at a yelp and a thud. He found a box of bullets laying open of the wooden stairs.

He turned back to the room as yells and screams issued from it's confines. A few minutes later, the woman opened the door, handing Knives his gun. In the background, Knives saw his beloved brother laying unconscious by a broken chair. He looked back to the woman still wearing the traveling cloak, smiling happily at her accomplishment.

"So," Knives started as he raised an eyebrow at the woman's smile, "what was your name again?"

The girl stared at him a while, happiness swiftly replaced by confusion. "Father, you never gave me a name."

"Hmmm," Knives started, walking back to his room followed by the woman. "You've proved yourself useful so far. Why don't I just call you Clone," a high-pitched squeal came from behind him, "and we'll see if I change it." he finished, getting caught in another hug.

"Oh! Thank you! Thank you, father! I promise to be the best daughter you've ever had!" Clone said squeezing Knives harder.

"You're the only daughter I have." Knives said through his suffocating coughs. ******



Worst bit. I'm crying for christ's sake....

And the ending thus far, I had to include it....it just....speaks for itself.

C-E: Another short chapter. Sorry, but trust me, the next one will make up for it. Knives needs some time alone from the scratching on his door at night (you'll find out..) so he sends Clone on an impossible mission. To recover his lost (and by lost I mean DEAD) right hand man, Legato... Can Clone find the undead servant? Or will she be cursed to wander the sea of sand for entirety trying to please her beloved father. Find out in the next Clone!

Warning: Contains SPOILERS. May cause seizures and brain twitches (if you think too hard about Clone's thoughts).